
12th March 2018
by Charlotte Wilson
Categories
Funny, productivity, thoughts
Who loves Monday? Anyone? We know, it’s a tough day, even the most sprightly of people are likely to struggle to find the joy in a Monday morning. Why? Because it marks the start of another week, another long and stressful week of navigating your workload, leading meetings, appeasing clients, managing staff and just, well, trying to survive life. And no matter how good, or very average, your weekend was, when the alarm goes off early on a Monday morning, we all have to brace ourselves, grit our teeth, and drag ourselves into the day ahead.
With that in mind, here at Pistachio HQ in Marlow, we like to try and make Monday as painless as possible by spreading a little joy and positivity. So, we’ve compiled a list of our top survival tips to help us through even the most monstrous of Monday’s and thus go on and smash the rest of the week ahead…
1. Shower/bathe/cocoon yourself before bed on a Sunday night, in fact sleep in your work clothes ready for the next day, because we all know that when your alarm goes off in the morning that the snooze button is getting hit more than once – and who has time to wash and dress when there’s an extra 5 minutes of fitful sleep to be had?
2. Mentally prepare yourself for the fact that there are 5 times the amount of cars on the road on a Monday morning than any other day of the week. They do not want to be in traffic and you do not want to be in traffic – so stay calm, stay caffeinated and just enjoy the dulcet tones of your death metal playlist on the slow drive in to work.
3. Assume that everyone else is a fellow Monday-hater and is also just trying to get to 6pm with as little human interaction as possible. With this in mind, don’t talk too much to colleagues or pry too much into their weekend activities, especially those wearing sunglasses inside, people will have more respect for you if you keep your head down, get the work done and get out.
4. Allow some me-time on your lunch break, you need this time to catch up on news, replenish the brain cells you might have lost over the weekend by reading about current affairs, and also, most importantly, to find out what kind of bagel you are on BuzzFeed.
5. Wear black – it makes you feel powerful and ‘together’ and shows that you are a respectful mourner of the loss of the weekend. It’s also really easy to disguise any stains when you inevitably spill Saturday nights left over chicken tikka masala all over yourself at lunchtime.
6. Keep an abundant amount of coffee coming to help see you through the day, even connect it to an IV if you have to, the same goes for snacks and treats – remember, calories don’t count on a Monday, so keep those energy levels and endorphins up by any means necessary.
7. Accept the fact that you might have to ingest alcohol tonight, I know that it’s a weekday and I know that your liver has been helplessly waving that white flag since Friday night, but if Monday really must be a thing then there is absolutely no way that you should deny yourself the sweet nectar of sugary poison on this most difficult of days. And if it really is so bad for you, then why would Jesus turn water into it? An undisputed fact that no one can argue with… Plus, Tesco currently have Malbec on offer for £5 on the nose. You’re welcome.
8. Cancel that hot yoga class you booked onto when you were half way through that terrible bottle of Shiraz on Saturday night. Monday’s were not built for exercise. You have already given yourself enough of a mental workout by generally being awesome at your job, so give your body a rest, a pat on the back and a wind down on the sofa this evening.
9. Be sure to mentally visualise your plans for the coming weekend, whether this involves eating your body-weight in cheese, watching an entire Netfilx series, botching some DIY or sitting in your dressing gown for 72 hours straight – there’s no judgement here and the world is your oyster, so make some plans and use them to motivate yourself through the rest of the week.
10. Go to bed as early as possible and praise the powers that be that you have survived another Monday and you are ready to tackle the rest of the week with the even more steely determination than before – you are a survivor, you can do it, we believe in you!
So now we are nearly another Monday down we hope our top tips have helped to ease you in to another fast-paced week ahead – and if you do get some extra time on your lunch break, check out some our latest creative, strategic and digital work here.
Happy Monday!